What Comes Next, Apart From Cake.

Introducing you to some of my hopes for the future as well as the recipe for the banana, caramel and peanut butter cake I have been making recently.

Hello everyone, I hope you are all well.

I have been thinking a lot about what this space and community are for, what are we building? What do I want to write about? What’s important to me? and What can I offer you here?

This week i’m going to introduce you to what I want this space to be and some very tentative dreams for the future. There will always be food and recipes I can’t help myself but I also want it to encompass other beliefs and open conversations about how we move through this world. At the end of this newsletter as with most you will find a recipe. This week it is for the banana and peanut butter cake I have been dreaming of since I went to Fife. It is dense in the best way, so satisfying to slice. It lives tentatively on the border between sweet and savoury with wholemeal flour, peanut butter, creme fraiche and salt. She is a little dark and sophisticated.

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Welcome to Moments through food. Here I write to you weekly from my steading in the Scottish borders. Telling stories about food and ingredients alongside my slightly obsessive recipe development. I am here to give you the tools to understand how or why things work in recipes. This is to help you build confidence in the kitchen as well as being able to alter recipes to suit your own time schedules and tastes. I believe cooking and baking need to work for you.

I am a sourdough baker, recipe developer, cook and mum. Formerly of Twelve Triangles an award winning bakery in Edinburgh as well as author of Kitchen Table - simple things made well.

If you would like to join my community please subscribe below for free. You will receive weekly emails with stories and recipes as well as having access to my archive and subscriber chat.

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What’s the point? What really matters?

This is a very opened ended and leading question but I think it’s a good place to start.

I was talking to Stephi Blackwell about this the other week, what do we want as our epitaph? When we are no longer here what do we want those around us to say about lives we lived? I find this an incredibly important question to come back to and have done since it was first posed to me by a counsellor in my 20’s. It can help re-focus you when you feel utterly bogged down in the immediate.

Charlie and Iain. Our safety and happiness as a family is my number one priority. When I leave this life if what is said about me is that I was a good mother and partner then frankly I am over the moon. That is my core, my beliefs and hopes for the rest of my life then spider out from there.

It’s easy to get caught up in the trappings of life. Endlessly scrolling looking at everything you don’t have, how everyone else is prettier, richer, more successful than you. That in itself is the trap, being sucked into this constant cycle of want and competition, the tragedy being we forget to live our lives. There are endless demonstrations of this at every scale possible. People viewing music concerts through their phone screens more concerned about the content they are capturing than actually being present in the moment. I catch myself doing it almost daily, I will be taking a picture of Charlie playing, trying to preserve the moment to look back on. Was I really there in the first place if my concern was on recording it for prosperity as opposed to living it. I have no solutions for these problems, I am flawed but I’m spending time trying to work out how to live a good life and what I think that means.

Of course I have an ego, the human desire to hope that I was put here for more. That my sphere of influence will be slightly larger than the two loves of my life. I was listening to a podcast (Miss Me) and Zawe Ashton said something which struck me,

“ Is your ambition deep or is it wide.”

I have spent the last decade of my life chasing more, being caught up in the excitement, the doing of it, expansion and box ticking, that gave me purpose. Now I want to go deeper, to hone my values, questioning my motives as I go. I have always cared about our food, the people making and growing it. I wrote a book dedicated to some of them. Now I am going further, you cannot fail to notice the difficulties our farmers are facing, they need support. This week Scotland the Bread, which was founded by Andrew Whitley the man who first introduced me to sourdough has sadly announced they will no longer be milling grain. I loved this flour, using it weekly in my bread and cakes. They were stuck in a system with rising costs and a lack of support which fundamentally means they can no longer continue as they were, it is a huge loss to the community.

Andrew’s dream was to decentralise our grain supply. Demonstrating that wheat can be grown and milled within local communities around the UK. Selling to local bakers making bread for their communities. It is a beautiful dream and one I firmly believe in. Heritage grains grown organically free from chemicals and in harmony with our soil. A system which supports and replenishes our earth whilst providing us with food that is actually nutritious. It is possible. Yet it is vital we start to appreciate and prioritise those growing our food. As the government adds more and more enrichment into our flour to supplement what the current system has removed I want to take control of the bread I make and everything in it.

Where’s it all going?

This is a crazy thing to announce but I think I might become a miller/baker. Not on a big scale I am done with that but at my home milling the flour for the people I bake bread for. Getting to know the farmer and the land where the wheat will grow. This is one of the more ludicrous and impractical ideas I have had. I remember talking to Ben from E5 bakehouse in London probably a decade ago, he said whatever you do never mill your own flour. He now grows his own wheat as well as milling and baking bread. It does not make financial sense, it will be a long road where I need to apply for funding, grants and planning permission, none of this is my strong suit. Part of the project would be that I bring the local schools out to teach the children more about bread, grain and milling. This is so they have the opportunity to grow up knowing what bread actually is and valuing it. I want this project to support our whole community and for them to feel part of it.

I’m going to introduce you to space we have at the steading, it was the old coach house. It has lapsed planning permission to turn it into a home but I think I have a better idea.

The old coach house.

I have a fantastical dream to turn this space into a food orientated creative studio. A small stoneground mill at one end, vast communal tables to teach workshops at, space for writing and a little production space for me to make bread, jams and a few other bits and pieces. I want this to become a space I can welcome people into. To take a breath, allowing themselves time to focus on the type of life they want to lead. I want to knock huge glass doors into the solid wall at the back which leads out to under the ancient crab apple tree. From there it flows down to the river Teviot, a riot of nettles and self seeding elder tress. I want to share my sense of wonder, playfulness and excitement for what we can affect in our lives. I believe one of the biggest political choices we can make is to choose where we spend our money, through that act we are in control of who we are supporting. Is it local? or is it global? and who do they help? Food is one of the best places to do this.

The back of the coach house leading to the crabapple and the river.

I want this journey to begin here with you. I have already learnt so much about myself since I started writing here, what matters, what you find exciting and how I can help with what I have already learned. The heart of this space will focus around these pillars.

1. Sharing knowledge

2. Community

3. Being a woman in this world

4. Food

5. Honesty / Authenticity

If you are new here I’m going to add links to some posts which represent who I am, what I think and write about. I love food and baking but I dream of this being so much more than that. Some week’s it is all about recipe development trying to give you the understanding of how and why something works so you have the confidence to adapt it at home. Other’s are essay’s about suppliers, moments from my past or issues I come across as I move through this world. I want a space of engagement and debate, I want to know what you think. None of this is about being perfect, it is about want, need, consumption, fear and the real messy condition of being human.

Body hair and being female

All things chickens and eggs

Womens busyness

Talking about sourdough hydration

A trip to my local flour supplier

The power of food and two loaves of bread

Mountains of Madeline's

Now it’s time for cake.

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Banana & Peanut Butter Cake

I have waxed lyrical about this cake many times, I first ate it from Cormo bakery in Fife. I do not have their recipe so this is me desperately trying to come up with a version which means I can eat it at home without having to drive three and a half hours to get it. The original cake had a caramel filling between the layers and a delicious savoury peanut butter jacket. I am inherently lazy / like simple cakes so I wanted to see if I could still get the flavour profile without having to make as many separate components. I read a recipe from Thomasina Miers recently in The Guardian which I found intriguing. She made a caramel then built her batter from that as the sugar for her banana cake. I have never added caramel into the base of the cake as the sweetener but this seemed like a great place to start for adding more depth of flavour.

Stages of the caramel, all of this is just sugar.

I know caramel can be scary and put some off before even beginning, the fear of crystallising is strong. I firmly lived in this camp and for some caramels still do. There is endless lore around sugar, you should delicately wipe the sides of your pan with a wet paint brush to stop it crystallising. This has never worked for me, in fact all that has happened is that I have ruined brushes, caramel and got cross. The safest way to make caramel is what is called a dry sugar caramel, this means you can stir it with no fear. You add sugar to a pan on a low heat and slowly let it melt, physics would say using a low wide pan is helpful as the sugar layer won’t be thick meaning it will melt more evenly. A dry caramel means you don’t add anything else to the pan until the caramel has formed, no water here. If you notice at the bottom and edges of the pan the sugar has become liquid you can stir it to ensure it doesn’t burn before it has all become liquid. When you stir it, it will solidify to your spoon, don’t panic that’s okay it’s the shock of the cold. Keep the heat low gently stirring now and then and it will all begin to melt back in, if you think it is getting too dark you can take it off the heat and stir until the lumps are gone.

I scaled the final cake a little smaller than this brick in the end.

The format for this cake is a loaf tin or to be more specific I have used one of my bread tins that I also use for sourdough. These are my favourite, they have satisfyingly straight sides and edges and are easy to look after. They happily hold 850g of sourdough, they can do a bit more and make gorgeous loaf cakes. For bread I oil them, it takes a few goes of building up a patina before your loaves will easily drop out, then for cakes I line them with greaseproof. Normally I am not a big icing fan but as this is where we are getting our peanut butter hit from I have split it into three. The loaf is pretty solid so once cool you can easily cut through it with a serrated knife. It doesn’t overly matter if they are level as you will piece them back together.

The building of the cake

The recipe

Makes 1 loaf (you can find the measurements in the link above)

Ingredients

Cake

• 300g very ripe bananas (this is the weight out the skin and is about 5)

• 175g caster sugar

• 130g butter

• 50g creme fraiche

• 2 large eggs

• 100g wholemeal flour ( I used spelt)

• 60g plain flour

• 1 scant tsp bicarbonate

• 1 scant tsp baking powder

• 1/2 tsp sea salt

Peanut butter icing

• 120g soft butter

• 250g room temp peanut butter (ideally one which doesn’t separate)

• 130g sieved icing sugar

• Sea salt to taste

• 20g creme fraiche

Method

• Begin by lining your tin with greaseproof paper and turning the oven on to 170c fan.

• In a medium sized sauce pan add the caster sugar and place on a low heat.

• Weigh out the butter and creme fraiche separately.

• As the sugar begins to melt you can stir it to make sure that it melts evenly. Once there is no dry sugar left and it is all melted to an amber colour add in the butter.

• Stir the butter through until all melted and beginning to combine. This is a lot of butter so it won’t emulsify until the creme fraiche is added.

• Add the creme fraiche into the pan and stir until it is all melted and emulsified together. Take it off the heat.

• Mash the bananas in a large bowl.

• Weigh the dry ingredients into another bowl, sift the plain flour but not the wholemeal.

• Add the mashed bananas into the pan and whisk to combine (this helps to lower the temp and stop the caramel from seizing) then pour all the mixture back into the bowl.

• Crack both eggs in and whisk well until it looks a little creamy.

• Fold in the dry ingredients and pour into the tin and bake.

• This takes 35-45 mins depending on your oven, it is cooked when skewer or piece of spaghetti comes out clean.

• As soon as it comes out the oven cover it with a tea towel, we want to trap the steam and moisture in. Allow it to cool like this.

• Once cool split it into three, I do this by using a serrated knife to cut through from one end to the other through the length.

• To make the icing paddle together the butter and peanut butter until smooth and combined.

• Sieve the icing sugar and add this into the butter mix at the same time as the creme fraiche. Mix on slow scraping down the sides to make sure it’s all evenly combined. Taste and add salt to your liking.

• If you are overly bothered about having a very flat surface to the top of your cake, I build it upside down. If your cake has domed at all you can trim the top to flatten then I use this as the bottom. Spread a layer of your icing going all the way to the edges.

• Place the middle piece onto the icing, then ice the top of that as well. Put the final piece on top then cover the whole thing in icing. I start by icing the sides, I put icing onto my palette knife then put that onto the cake and work it over the surface.

• Once all four sides are iced I pull off any excess icing by running my palette knife around the edges. Then dollop the rest of the icing on top and spread it.

• It is entirely up to you if you want to make this fancy, if you enjoy piping, or want to sprinkle roasted peanuts on it etc. I am a plain Jane and am in it for the eating so I will always do the bare minimum unless it’s for an event.

Notes

1. You can bake this as a tray if you would rather and do a single layer with icing on top for minimum faff. You will just need to reduce your baking time, maybe check it at 25 minutes, you are still looking for a skewer to come out clean.

2. Please use the ripest bananas possible for maximum flavour, there is a trick of baking them in the oven to speed it up if you really can’t wait.

3. For the icing if you can have the peanut butter and butter at the same temperature it helps, as you are mixing two fats they could split if there is a temperature shock.

4. Once the icing sugar is in with the butters you only need to mix it slowly, once again furious whisking could cause it to split.

Thank you for reading please let me know if you make the cake and what you think, as usual any questions just shout. School summer holidays are rapidly coming. In Scotland we finish early so we only have two weeks left then Charlie has finished primary one which seems wild. My sister is coming over from LA and we are all going to Margate for a week which we are so excited for. There are some bakeries I can finally go and visit including Oast run by Will who I used to work with and his wife.

I hope you all have a wonderful week for those in the UK enjoy in the sun, I think we are finally getting some in Scotland.

Emily

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You can buy my debut cookbook Kitchen Table- simple things made well

It is a recipe book focused on some of my favourite suppliers telling their stories. It is filled with recipes to make the most of these beautiful ingredients as well as minimising waste. Chapters are split into ingredients like olive oil, butter, fruit, milk & cream etc. You will find recipes for baking, cooking and fermenting.